Tag: limerick

In the face of each ludicrous lie told

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Morning Joe dropped a very revealing nugget on Monday’s show, with both Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski accusing White House Counsellor Kellyanne Conway of being a fraud.

 

Now, obviously, Conway’s regular use of “alternative facts” is nothing new, but Mika and Joe went even further, alleging that she secretly hates Trump and made it known to them after appearances on their show during the campaign.

 

Per Brzezinski:

 

“This is a woman, by the way, who came on our show during the campaign and would shill for Trump in extensive fashion and then she would get off the air, the camera would be turned off, the microphone would be taken off and she would say ‘bleeech I need to take a shower’ because she disliked her candidate so much.”

 

Scarborough backed it up 100%.

 

Kellyanne Conway Secretly Hates Donald Trump
Mediaite

 

 

In the face of each ludicrous lie told
when Kellyanne opens her pie hole,
those verbal contortions
of epic proportions
are worthy of Anderson’s eye roll.

Mary Boren, 5/16/17

 

While schmoozing two Russians last week

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Last Wednesday, security experts nearly had a conniption when they realized that President Trump had welcomed Russian state media into the Oval Office. It turns out that was the least of the security breaches that day.

 

[…]

 

Trump’s disclosure of the sensitive details, withheld even from American allies, to Russia, an uneasy rival in the Middle East, is yet another jawdropping misstep by a president whose administration thus far is best viewed as a series of errors and gaffes.

 

Trump Revealed Highly Classified Information to Russian Officials
The Atlantic

 

 

While schmoozing two Russians last week,
the POTUS allowed them a peek
at intel on Isis
creating a crisis
of trust among allies we seek.

Susan E. Eckenrode, 5/15/17

 

Our reality show President

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Democracies are fragile, after all. They need informed and engaged citizens to survive. “I’m afraid the frustrated public is tuning out and waiting for the storm to pass,” she said. “The problem is, it could be too late.”

 

And so the enduring image from the surreal week is not Russian officials (photographed by a Russian government staff member, no less) yukking it up with Trump in the White House.

 

It’s not Deputy Attorney General Rod J. Rosenstein looking shellshocked on Capitol Hill.

 

It’s not even the jobless Comey puttering in his yard.

 

No, the enduring image is Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, half in shadow Tuesday night, as he told journalists to “just turn the lights off” so he could brief them without being filmed. Metaphors don’t get any better than that.

 

We’re only four months into this presidency. The lights need to stay on.

 

How the chaotic Trump news cycle confuses and misinforms the public
Margaret Sullivan, Perspective, The Washington Post

 

Our reality show President
has erected a really big tent
where he practices pitches
for determining which is
his most outrageous act to present.

Lily Beth Baker, 5/15/17

 

So his lawyers are giddily gushin’

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Some tax-law experts questioned key parts of the letter, including how the lawyers defined “Russian” sources and lenders. Major companies in Russia frequently use subsidiaries in other jurisdictions, like Cyprus, the Netherlands or the British Virgin Islands, to conduct overseas business. Moreover, it was unclear what the lawyers meant by asserting that the tax returns did not “reflect” any income from Russian sources.

 

The letter also restricts itself to income on Mr. Trump’s returns, with no exploration of underlying transactions of other entities that file their own returns, such as partnerships.

 

Trump Lawyers Say He Had No Russian Income or Debt, With Some Exceptions
The New York Tiimes

 

So his lawyers are giddily gushin’
to report that no income from Russian
investments appears
for over ten years
(except for exceptions they’re hushin’)

Lily Beth Baker, 5/13/17

 

Are there any Republicans working

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Even conservatives are calling for the GOP to step up to the plate:

“On it went all week—one Trumpian argument after another falling apart. And yet Republican officeholders mostly stuck by their president. Some of them praised Trump. Others avoided comment. Still others focused exclusively — reflexively, predictably — on the (very real) inconsistency of Democrats.”

 

[…]

 

“We understand these arguments. We’ve made some of them. But there are times, when the stakes are high, that self-respecting officeholders need to lead, even if it’s politically risky, rather than circle the wagons.”

 

Where Are the Statesmen in the GOP?
Taegan Goddard’s Political Wire
quoting William Kristol

 

 

Are there any Republicans working
to curb the catastrophe lurking?
Is their own moral compass
subsumed in that trump ass
who’s bilking the country and smirking?

Mary Boren, 5/13/17

He’s a real DIY kind of guy

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President Donald Trump on Friday floated an alternative to his press secretary’s traditional daily press briefings: Himself.

 

During an interview with Fox News host Jeanine Pirro, to air on Saturday, Trump suggested he moves too quickly for his communications staff. One solution, he said, is “we don’t have press conferences.”

 

“You don’t mean that,” Pirro responded.

 

“Well, just don’t have them,” Trump said. “Unless I have them every two weeks and I do them myself, we don’t have them. I think it’s a good idea.”

 

Trump Suggests He Could Handle Press Briefings Instead Of Sean Spicer
The Huffington Post

 

He’s a real DIY kind of guy;
he alone gets things done by and by.
He can handle the press
and manage each mess
he creates without batting an eye.

Susan E. Eckenrode, 5/13/17

 

Though the POTUS has tweeted a threat

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Democratic Reps. Elijah Cummings and John Conyers, the respective ranking members of the House oversight and judiciary committees, requested from White House counsel Donald McGahn copies of all recordings between Trump and Comey.

 

“It is a crime to intimidate or threaten any potential witness with the intent to influence, delay, or prevent their official testimony,” the two wrote in a letter. “The President’s actions this morning — as well as his admission yesterday on national television that he fired Director Comey because he was investigating Trump campaign officials and their connections to the Russian government — raise the specter of possible intimidation and obstruction of justice. The President’s actions also risk undermining the ongoing criminal and counter-intelligence investigations and the independence of federal law enforcement agencies.”

 

Trump threatens Comey in Twitter outburst
CNN

 

 

Though the POTUS has tweeted a threat
to intimidate Comey, don’t fret…
it’s another lame ruse
and another lit fuse
for a smoke bomb he’s gonna regret.

Susan Eckenrode, 5/12/17

 

Cover-up Stench

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On May 9, Donald Trump became the second United States president to fire the director of the FBI. Naturally, Americans wanted to know: Why?

 

The exact answer remained elusive over the course of three days following the announcement. Trump and his White House gave numerous, contradictory explanations for James B. Comey’s firing.

 

As a public service, we compiled a timeline of the shifting rhetoric by Trump and his staff. We will update this list as necessary.

 

All of the White House’s conflicting explanations for Comey’s firing: A timeline
The Washington Post

 

Yes the firing of Comey’s a cinch
to elicit a cover-up stench,
while the POTUS and crew
twist the facts all askew
and deny they gave Putin an inch.

Susan E. Eckenrode, 5/11/17

The media should be much nicer

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In Friday’s briefing, White House press secretary Sean Spicer denied that a tweet from President Trump threatening former FBI director James B. Comey was a threat, insisted that the president maintained a busy schedule and therefore it was hard to be accurate all the time, dodged a question about whether the president tapes White House meetings, boasted about how hard his people work, uttered the mantra “the tweet speaks for itself,” maintained that his shop didn’t, in fact, mislead the public about the rationale for Comey’s firing, even though it clearly did, and lamented how the media is obsessed with small things.

 

Another day at the office, in other words.

 

The Daily Spicer: ‘He’s a nice man’
Eric Wemple, Opinion, The Washington Post

 

 

The media should be much nicer
to me and to you, my dear Spicer.
Because you stayed hidden,
that isn’t forbidden!
Next time, just tell ‘em “Aye aye, sir.”

Eric Linden, 5/11/17

 

Now the Spice man is hiding in bushes

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“Whatever Spicer’s fate, the scrambled effort to address Comey’s firing has revealed something significant about this White House, which is that its press secretary is growing increasingly irrelevant.

 

“Already beset by critics who say he has lost his credibility, Spicer may now be losing his authority. His charge is to tell the media, and the public, what the president is thinking. And yet it is becoming increasingly clear that he is either not able to fulfill that task, or choosing not to.”

 

Sean Spicer under fire during crucial week for Trump
CNN Media

 

 

Now the Spice man is hiding in bushes
And he’ll answer all queries with shushes.
At the end of his rope
And unable to cope,
Does he even know where is own tush is?

Lily Beth Baker, 5/12/17